... etonic's journey ...
Sunday, November 29, 2009
decided 2 open back my blog so tt u guys dun haf 2 keep asking me 4 access oso...but pls bear wif all e emotions if u wanna read...rascal flatts - wat hurts e most??
e suay-est month i eva haf...1st it's break up...n now car accident...everything happened within 2 weeks...indeed a veri big blow 2 me...n e accident tt gif me an instant shock at tt veri moment...hands tt were covered wif blood...n i thought my rite eye will b blinded coz of e blood tt keep dripping...was in total fear n shock tt i couldnt stop myself frm shivering...juz imagine how suay can i get...5 pple in e lorry...n im e onlie 1 hu got injured n it's all on my face...thank god arms n legs r onlie bruises...i cant imagine how would it b if things haf been worse...
n at tt veri moment...i lost my sense of reactions...everything is juz fear...n it hurts alot...but i juz haf 2 take it so easy n calm so tt frenz dun haf 2 worry 4 me... becoz of e pain...e blood n everything...i did haf e feeling tt i rather die...coz i cant take e heartache-ing feelings nemore...break ups wif luv ones hurts alot...y do pple lyk 2 go ard hurting each other so much??pls tell me...y can guys 4get n move on so fast...lyk nothing happened b4??i wanna haf e heart of a guy oso...coz acting so strong is reallie hard...plus now im worried how i would look after i recovered...will everything still b e same??
amanda kept me accompanied throughout e process...if not i would probably juz collasped...e fear in an ambulance cant stop me frm tearing...blood pressure went up till 144/85 frm my normal 120/75...n it hurts when e paramedics tried to clear my wounds...got my wound glued...injection n x-tray...everything is fine...no fractures...now is juz a matter whether dere will b scar n will i b able 2 overcome tis phobia...n few of them sae me coz my injuries wasnt my main concern...but rather my name chain tt matters 2 me alot...
nehow...things happened when we were on our wae 2 collect all e bicycles 4 xtreme...n e damn car juz run awae n none of us saw e car plate...n it took me n few others quite a while 2 convince jun ren's 2 let me continued wif xtreme till it ends...despite all e injuries i juz wanna c e success of xtreme...e effort n time tt every1 thrown in tis 2 mths...plus it's kind of e official last event as an exco...i juz wanna do a good job n clear everything...even though i complained alot n so do every1 else coz of some unfairness here n dere...still we did all our part by giving up lotsa things...i noe how much effort i've put in 4 xtreme n since e start of foc...so i juz wanna stayed on even though every1 asked 2 go hm rest...i noe if i stayed at hm...i'll b tinking of e whole event n suffered even more frm disappointment...juz haf 2 end up begging e heads 2 let me stay on...
u'll onlie noe how much time n effort u've put in...n whether pple recognise is another thing...coz u dun haf 2 go ard saeing 2 purposely let them recognise e effort...n 4 those hu alwae act busy...of coz all of us noe xcept those hu r reallie closed will cover up 4 each other...through tis event...i lost u...n oso becoz of tis event...i've becum much closer 2 few more excos n freshies n understand them betta...im quite surprised when few hu arent closed 2 me could actuallie proached me n tap on my head...told me they noe im acting strong 4 e breakup n being veri strong 2 go back even after e accident...yeah it definitely hurts me alot...but im veri touched 2 hear all those words...esp coming out frm someone hu's not even close 2 me...
im glad tt xtreme ended off well...n probably most of them r still sleeping now after all e loading n unloading tt started frm thu till 2+am yesterdae...every1 deserve a gd break now...but it felt kind of empty now...coz suddenly u feel so free n even if i keep going out...i've 2 face all e looks tt pple gif me on e streets now...n im veri veri sick of eating porridge...lucky e accident happened during e point of depression state...at least going without food arent tt bad...
parents r worried 4 me...n my mum wanna stop me frm doing sports nemore...tis coz alot of arguments...dun let me do sports is no diff frm asking me 2 die...plus tis is a car accident n i didnt injured myself coz of sports...i even did rockclimbing 6 times during xtreme yesterdae...im juz so gonna argue wif her till she agrees...i noe she worried 4 me alot...but sports is lyk a part of me 2...i've oledi lost my luv...i cant afford 2 lose a part of myself 2...im e 1 receiving all e blows now...no 1 can understand how much im feeling now...esp when things happened within 2 weeks...
going out 2 meet my babes ltr...i noe every1 will feel veri heartbroken 4 me once they c me...but locking up at hm make things worse 4 me...i cant stop tinking of tis 2 things...n thanz 4 all e calls + sms + care n concern tt each n every single of u showered me wif...juz gif me some time...i'll b back as e happie kylie wong u guys noe...n of coz back 2 camwhore once recovered...gonna b camera shy 4 e time being...coz my face is so ugly now...lolx
results will b out on e 3rd...dunno how i'll fair n juz cant afford 2 fail...n marathon will b on e 6th...juz hope my face will recover by den n im so going 4 e marathon...even walk oso wanna complete e 42km...coz giving up is so not me...dere will definitely b a solution 2 all problems...is juz whether pple r willing 2 accept...some pple lyk 2 avoid n run awae frm problems 4 their whole life n some would rather face it n try 2 overcome...mayb i juz prefer 2 face it...n probably tis is y it takes me ages 2 4get...but at least i did not lie 2 myself by avoiding or running awae...n i noe i've tried my veri bez oledi...
kat-tun - crazy luv
Thursday, November 26, 2009
13/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE aLvIn~!~!~!
15/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE jAsMyN~!~!~!
17/10/09 --> hApPiE dEePaVaLi~!~!~!
20/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE eUgEnE~!~!~!
22/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE LaY kHeNg~!~!~!
22/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE aNdReW~!~!~!
23/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE jIe~!~!~!
23/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE mIsA~!~!~!
28/10/09 --> hApPiE aNnIvErSaRy PaM~!~!~!
29/10/09 --> hApPiE bDaE eRiN~!~!~!
31/10/09 --> hApPiE haLLoWeEn~!~!~!
06/11/09 --> hApPiE bDaE rIcHaRd~!~!~!
finallie got myself a new titus watch!!!n i save up 100+ bucks 4 it...coz orginal price is 200+ n i got it on sale 4 79 bucks onlie!!! =)) nehow...thanz 2 all my dearest frenz hu haf been dere 4 me...whether u r here with me or juz concern me thru sms or call...i reallie appreciate lots...wateva e final outcome will b...i'll still stay strong 4 all of u...juz gif me some time k...n let me make good use of tis time 2 lose some weight 2...lolx
gonna camp @ halus frm tml till sat/sun 4 e finale...n tt's extreme...tink i've thrown in lotsa effort 4 odac since foc camp till now...a total of 5 events i handle...time 4 me 2 hand over after extreme...is wae 2 tiring...friendship or relationship or wateva it is...dere's lotsa complications 4 every1...it feels good in odac coz i make lotsa frenz dere...but it hurts alot...esp 2 c all e close ones ended up so bad when working wif each other...n some suffered breakups coz of neglection n misunderstandings...mayb e bez is 2 continue odac but as member n not as an exco...tt would make life so much betta...
counting down 2 e finale...but will i still get e chance 2 c u once we handover??
-09-12/10-
odac stong trek
frm sg-jb
in e train till dabong
when we reached dabong
breakfast till caving...
during caving
after camping till we trek up 2 base camp
dinner
sunrise~~~
1-10...
breakfast
when we hit e waterfall...
lotsa fun @ e waterfall...
trekking down till dinner...
waiting 4 train back
13th batch...
bak ku teh + zi bao ji @ jb...
tau huey @ city square...
-13/10-
odac meeting
during meeting...
supper @ bukit merah's yong tau fu
-14/10-
met up after our work...
dinner @ thai express...
neoprints again...
-15/10-
valley point-ed wif daph...den he joined us 4 supper @ spize...
-16/10-
nike race pack collection wif odac...den 2 suntec 4 dinner...den 2 bugis 4 desserts...n i 4get 2 take all e pix frm fb!!!nez entry den...
nite was supper wif odac planning comm route 3 pple...we went 4 a spin...coz all e places we wanna haf supper were closed...n we end up having dim sum @ jalan besar...e food is good!!!
dim sum 4 supper!!!
food we haf...
those hu were present...
-17/10-
stayed over his place 2 mug...
-18/10-
celebrated lian tee's bdae wif les @ fortune cuisine @ sunset wae...n after tt stayed @ his place...
dinner @ fortune cuisine...
happie bdae lian tee!!!
wif luv frm les + bfs...
randoms...
les wif 3 missing...
-19/10-
we set off 4 sentosa...went 4 some tanning n played e luge + skyride...den 2 town 2 watch hurt locker...n we head 2 marina pier 2 relax...
on e wae 2 sentosa...
suntanning
during skyride...
n playing go cart...
dinner @ town
da bao tau huey frm selegie n chill @ marina pier...
-20/10-
celebrated eugene's + andrew's bdae wif ex-poly-ians @ udders @ bukit timah...
happie bdae eugene + andrew!!!
wif e individuals...
n a group pix...
-21/10-
tonned @ his place 2 mug
-22/10-
went 2 visit pam @ mt alvernia...guys r 2pid...throw stones @ them!!!nehow...went 2 chomp chomp wif few exco 4 dinner + desserts...
visiting pam + her baby...haha
dinner @ chomp chomp
n somewhere in serangoon gardens 4 dessert...
-23/10-
dinner wif odac @ bedok 85
tang yuan rox!!!
-24/10-
nike human 10k race...supposedly 2 b a fun race dae wif odac or canoeists...but it turns out 2 b rather disappointing n upset dae 4 me...so much things happened...still...i haf fun becoz of e presence of e rest...
b4 till during e run...
2gether wif canoeists during e run...
after e race wif odac + joyce wong
more camwhorings...
canoeists!!!
odac-ians!!!
n my beloved utt!!!
i got an individual shot wif him!!!haha
after e race...
-25/10-
bbq-ed wif e alcoholics...a post exam 4 kenny n marcus...but a pre exam 4 me n eric n vincent...
while getting e fire started...
time 4 some alcohol...
when we wander ard...
my fellow/ex canoeists...
-26/10-
odac celebrating oct babies' bdae...
dinner @ crystal jade's steamboat buffet
happie bdae jiali + jiaguang + samuel!!!
all e camwhores!!!
-27/10-
xiang zhong came 2 valley point 2 mug wif me...
-31/10-
supper wif gf (daph) + ons @ spize...thanz 4 coming down juz 2 c me...=))
-01/11-
great eastern women's 10k run...dennis accompany peiyu n joyce wong n me 2 run...n becoz of me...we kind of practicallie walk...haha
b4 + during + after e run...
ge women 10k run!!!
dinner wif pam n edmund @ liang court
food tt is real cheap...
n tonned mugging wif dennis @ airport...
-02/11-
old town cafe-ed wif ex-poly-ians after law paper...feels lyk it's e end of exams 2 us...though we haf 1 last 2 go...we could actuallie juz sit n relax n tok cok 4 so long!!!lolx...n we saw liang jia ban n nono dere...
-04/11-
celebration 4 end of exams wif ex-poly-ians @ timbre...n we watched luv happens...luv happens without a reason...but does it ends without a reason as well??
dinner @ timbre...
n we haf our drinks...
ex-poly-ians...looking so happie after exams!!!
-05/11-
kbox wif pam...our post anni celebration...1 yr juz flew pass in a wink...juz how fast time flies...gonna count as anni instead of monthsary frm now on...n we gonna celebrate many many yrs down e road...thanz gf 4 standing by me tis 1 whole yr!!! =))
singing our hearts out...
dinner wif daph...followed by michael jackson's tis is it movie...
ajisen 4 dinner
-06/11-
ktv wif ex-poly-ians...we haf reallie good singers among us...n they can b my next clique of alcoholics clique...drink drank drunk!!!haha
$10 ktv rox!!!
ex-poly-ians!!!
nite was spent watching poker king wif odac...honestly i didnt noe it's a cheena movie...coz of e title...i thot was some ang mo movie lyk 21...though it's casted by louis ku + liu qing yun...but cheena movie is still out of my range...unless they r my idol or is a die die muz watch movie...coz cheena movie r kind of waste money...lolx...nehow was selegie tau huey after tt...
shopping ard...
they r so engrossed wif their basketball...
supper @ selegie...
-07/11-
a dae 2 remember...indeed...it's e official dae we got 2gether...though it onlie lasted 4 juz 1 pathetic week...but i haf lotsa fun n gd memories 4 e past few mths wif u...thanz 4 everything excluding all e hurts u brought me now...tinking back n looking at all e pix...i felt reallie happie...but now my mind juz keep wandering n wandering...cant stop tinking abt u...does all these things happened 4 a reason??is it reallie worth 2 gif it all up??does it affect u when u made tt decision??i cant wait 2 haf a gd explanation frm u...coz it hurts n it's reallie hard 2 push myself 2 move on...y y juz y?!?
where it begins...
<--her world-->
~!~!~!~kY|iE~!~!~!~
.29th jan 1986.
.code: #03.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.i choose 2 luv in silence.
.4 in silence i find no rejection.
.i choose 2 luv in ur loneliness.
.4 in ur loneliness no 1 owns but
me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
.nv luv a luv tt hurts.
.nv hurt a luv tt luvs.
.she desires.
.prada wallet + bag.
.b a trader.
~her memories~
.jun'04. .jul'04. .aug'04. .sep'04.
.oct'04. .nov'04. .dec'04. .jan'05.
.feb'05. .mar'05. .apr'05. .may'05.
.jun'05. .jul'05. .aug'05. .sep'05.
.oct'05. .nov'05. .dec'05. .jan'06.
.feb'06. .mar'06. .apr'06. .may'06.
.jun'06. .jul'06. .aug'06. .sep'06.
.oct'06. .nov'06. .dec'06. .jan'07.
.feb'07. .mar'07. .apr'07. .may'07.
.jun'07. .jul'07. .aug'07. .sep'07.
.oct'07. .nov'07. .dec'07. .jan'08.
.feb'08. .mar'08. .apr'08. .may'08.
.jun'08. .jul'08. .aug'08. .sep'08.
.oct'08. .nov'08. .dec'08. .jan'09.
.feb'09. .mar'09. .apr'09. .may'09.
.jun'09. .jul'09. .aug'09. .sep'09.
.oct'09. .nov'09. .dec'09. .jan'10.
.feb'10. .mar'10. .apr'10. .may'10.
.jun'10. .jul'10. .aug'10. .sep'10.
.oct'10. .nov'10. .dec'10. .jan'11.
.feb'11. .mar'11. .apr'11. .may'11.
.jun'11. .jul'11. .aug'11. .sep'11.
.oct'11. .nov'11. .dec'11.
she reads...
everyone screams!!!